Archive for July, 2014


Posted in Uncategorized on July 30, 2014 by immorticon

It’s like when you take the time to wash the butter knife because you don’t want to get peanut butter in the jelly jar and you open the jar to find that someone else got peanut butter in there… except that it’s constantly and with my entire life.


Posted in Uncategorized on July 21, 2014 by immorticon

“We weren’t in a relationship. We weren’t dating.”

But we were fucking. All your online profiles say you’re not interested in casual sex… so you’re either lying to me or you’re lying to yourself.